Tuesday, November 25, 2008

"Don't make me kick you in the forehead"

I suppose if you don't know me you really have to understand the relationship I have with my girls. We laugh all the time. They're great girls (Yes, I know I've said this countless times before, but they are) We always have a good time!

One of my phrases to them is , "Don't make me kill you in front of witnesses", or just "Don't make me kill you". That sounds really really bad, but it's a JOKE. Now Ashton on the other hand always says, "Don't make me kick you in the forehead" Which I find so hard to hear her say because when she was little and she didn't feel good she'd say, "mommy feel my fourth head I think I have a flever". I would always tell her, "If the other three don't have flevers than neither does the fourth one". So cute. Anyway, I digress.

So tonight we're all packing up to go to Disney and we're all standing in the foyer (me, Ashton and Brenna) In the foyer is a bench and a hall table , mirror etc. I had asked Ashton to go out to her car and get the Colts blanket so I could wash it to take on the trip, I bent down to pick up Max, she lifted her leg to put on shoes, and she "kicked me in the forehead". Wow, it smarted! The funny thing is I had just told Brenna that I was getting a headache! Ashton technically hit me in the forehead with her knee, but of course it fell back to the "Don't make me kick you in the forehead". We laughed till I about peed my pants.. then I kept saying, "Ohh man, is their a mark on my forehead"

A few minutes later I seriously thought, "I'm gonna look at my forehead, she really nailed it". I go in the bathroom and I had some red areas... then I remembered I got my eyebrows waxed this afternoon! HA!!!!

I can't wait to hear the jokes that come from this!! We love to laugh, so BRING IT ON!

Peaceout Girlscout!

Sunday, November 23, 2008

People who make a difference

We all have people that have impacted our lives, made a real difference in them. I suppose we all encounter someone every day that makes a difference in our lives, or at the very least our day.
I grew up in a little town, maybe 1000 people. As my mom always said, "People around here know ya fart before you do it". Maybe not the most eloquent thing my mother ever said, but the truth all the same.

We lived in a house in this small town and right next door lived my great-grandmother. She was really the only grand-mother I ever knew. My dad's mom had Multiple Scleoris and was an invalid as long as I can remember. In fact, she lived at our house for several years and we took care of her. I remember how pissed off I was as a 13-14 year old kid having to feed my grandmother baby food, and help move her bowels, or lift her up and change her with the hydralic lift. I still feel extreme guilt to this day because of those feelings I had. Oh I know it's normal, I also am sure that my parents felt a little burdened. It's human nature. When she was in the nursing home I remember getting off the school bus at the Elementary School and walking across the street to the nursing home to put lotion on her hands and feet, or to paint her nails, or to start one of her tapes of Christian music. She couldn't speak because of the M.S but she could sing, "I'll Fly Away". That song still means a lot to me. Maybe I wasn't a horrible grandchild to her, but I'm also quite sure I'll live with that guilt forever.

My grand-daddy (Dad's dad) was an amazing man. I don't think there's anyone who didn't love him. He would work, go feed Grandmaw at the nursing home on his lunch, go to my great-grandmothers and eat lunch quickly with her, go back to work and do the same thing again at supper. He'd stay at the nursing home with Grandmaw till time to go to bed. He did this over and over and over again for many many years. He would call the house and pretend to disguise his voice, funny thing is my dad does the same thing. He'd pretend to not know who you were etc. He offered me 10.00 to let him pull my tooth one time. I DID NOT take him up on that offer!! Imagine how much 10.00 was in the 70's! LOL He was the first person I ever lost that I truly loved. I was 11 and I can still feel that pain. What a great great man he was. I still miss him.

But my great-grandmother.. wow. She was the reason I did many things, wanted things.. I remember there used to be a little ceramics store downtown and I'd go in there and buy these useless trinkets and take one to grandmaw and she'd be so thrilled. She put them on the counter in her house, proudly displayed for all to see. My little brother, Matt, got a ring out of a gumball machine and had to give it to Grandmaw. I'm pretty sure she died with that ring on. She wore it for years and years. She's the reason I wanted to get my drivers license. She didn't drive and we would walk to the grocery or post office. I wanted to be able to take her. I think one of my proudest moments of my life is driving her to the little post office. The woman could cook. Oh my, what I wouldn't give to have her cook me another meal.. at the very least her potato salad. I was pregnant with Brenna when she died and she died right around my 23rd birthday. She moved to Florida with her kids when I was 18 but we wrote each other all the time. She had grandchild named Lesa, so the funny thing is in all these letters I have they're addressed to "Lesa" , not Lisa lol I don't care that she never spelt my name right. I had her everyday of my life till she moved to Florida. Every single day. And you know what? I miss her. Every single day. Every day. My brother has a daughter named after her. Hallie. She's spunky like Grandmaw too. I can still smell her.. the kind of lotion or perfume that she used, hear her laughter, and when she was really really mad she'd say "Shhht" she never cursed. That was as close as it came for her, but it made me laugh then and it makes me laugh now. It makes me so incredibly sad that my kids didn't know her. She met Ashton when Ashton was 2. I have pictures of her being held by Grandmaw, but it's just not the same. I wish they could know her love. She offered the greatest love to all she knew. She was 92 when she died, but it doesn't matter... I wanted her to live to be 192. She was 88 when she moved to Florida. I miss those 4 years too. I'm glad her kids got those four years, but I'm just selfish enough to be jealous that they got them. I certainly don't mean that as cruel as it sounds. Just the truth. She is a huge part of the who I was, who I am, and who I want to be. Man, I miss her.
I recently watched an epiosde of John Edwards Cross Country.. in the episode John says, "We never get over losing them, we just get through it". She's been gone since 93, I guess I'll always just "get through it". I hope she knew how much I loved her. I hope she still knows.

Peaceout Girlscout

Monday, November 10, 2008

Lost Diamonds

So the other day I was sitting in the recliner and must have lifted my right hand to move my hair back on the right side of my head.. I felt this stab. I looked down at my hand and I sucked all of the air out of the atmosphere. You know, one of those incredibly loud and long inward sighs? I had lost the diamond out of my engagement ring. I was horrified, saddened and at a loss. I immediately started replaying every moment of that day in my head.

Before I get too far I know you're thinking I typed "right hand" by mistake. I did not. This was my original engagement ring, which was a half carat round solitare. I wear my 10 yr anniversary gift (Engagement ring) a full carat round solitare on my left hand, along with my "gotten over the years" wedding band and anniversary band. On my right hand I wear my original just plain "we're too poor right now to get really cool bands" gold wedding band and my half carat round solitare.

Anywho.. My hubby says, "What????" in a half scared sort of way, and once I can breathe outwardly again I yell, "I lost the diamond out of my engagement ring". His response? Where? Okay, "How the hell do I know??" (yep, that was my response) I thought, "Okay, I put in a load of towels, it could have snagged on that, it could have snagged on the blankets when I was sleeping the night before", so of course I search everywhere. Brenna helped me pull towels out of the washer (although we had to wait for it to stop cause the damn thing won't let you open it till it's good and ready) We checked the dryer vent, the laundry room floor, my bed, everywhere! I never did find it.

My hubbys response to this entire situation was , "It's no big deal, that just gives me an idea of something to get you later on when we have the money." "Don't stress about it, you're never going to find it and it's no big deal." "You shouldn't feel bad, shit happens." "Lisa, seriously, it's no big deal." This went on for 4-5 hours that day as I proceeded to tear the house apart.

Later in the afternoon Ashton (who was at work during most all of this) comes home and she says, "So was it the big diamond or the smaller one?" I responded, "The smaller one, but it was my original" All of a sudden Brad is laughing hysterically.. I'm like, WHAT is your deal?? FREAK!! lol He said, "oh my god, that's great news, I thought it was the carat.. I can come way closer to replacing the half someday"

It was so funny to me that he kept up the "no big deal" attitude all day, when in the back of his mind he must have been going, "OMG that's 3000.00 laying around this house somewhere!!!" Ohh it makes me laugh outloud right now even. He's a good guy. But... he is a guy.

Listen... I love my carat, but I was really upset about losing this. Men don't get the value of diamonds. (outside of the monetary bit of it)

Most importantly, it's my own fault I lost it. It's been snagging on stuff for months and I never took it to be checked. My carat does it too because I have a prong that's a bit wider than it should be. It's spread out over the last 6 years. I don't take my rings off for anything... why have them if you don't wear them all the time.. besides, they have meaning, so I wear them. I will be taking this carat ring to the Jeweler on Tuesday to have the prong fixed!

Use this as a reminder to go and get your rings checked. It really sucks if something happens to them!

Peaceout Girlscout

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Soul searching.

I was reading another blog and was very interested in how this young girl (age 21) was trying to come to the realization of who she is. What she stands for. What's important to her. So I got to thinking.. I'm 38. Who am I? Who really knows who I am? So I have decided to tell me (and you if you're going to continue to read ha!) who I am. What I like. What I don't.

1. I am first and foremost a mom. Very happy to be a mom!

2. I can't say I loved High School, though I had a select few I did love. Kevin, Annette, Edie, LaChelle, Karen, Scott, Gregg. Not many more.

3. I loved Band. I still do. I was a band geek, my girls are band geeks.

4. I love roller coasters.

5. I hate fake people.

6. I hate dresses.

7. I love Bruce Springsteen!

8. I always tip well. (You should too)

9. I have many fears. Mostly about something happening to one of my girls.

10. I love my canine son, Max, probably too much.

11. I love to read.

12. I would love to meet Stephen King, Bruce Springsteen and Eve (she's on my shit list for the whole apple thing.. long story, but it involves me having to go through childbirth) ha!

13. I love Pepsi. Way too much. I am an addict. (have the tattoo to prove it)

14. I love my job. Not every aspect of course, but for the most part, I do.

15. I love gum. Cinnamon gum rocks.

16. I am the oldest of five kids. I actually like/love all of my siblings.

17. I love music. It's like the blood coursing through my veins. It's just that important to me.

18. I love being an Aunt.

19. I love to play games on the computer. (reflexive.com or pogo.com)

20. I'm a shorts and t-shirt and no shoes kinda gal. Don't try to change me ,it will never work.

21. I hate spiders. Seriously.

22. I'm a scorpio. That should explain a lot.

23. I hate lipstick.

24. I have 4 tattoos. Yes, four. A Pepsi logo, a butterfly, and dolphin and a half moon, half sun with Ashton above the tattoo and Brenna below it.

25. I hate racism.

26. My favorite meals are usually meals I make. Which sort of sucks lol

27. I adore my girls, and I'm quite sure they're spoiled rotten. But they are good girls.

28. The first car I drove was a 1977 Country Squire Station wagon with wood paneling down the side. Holy Hell it was horrible!!! But.. it got me where I was going and when I graduated I bought me a brand new 88 escort gt. Man I loved that car.

29. There are about four people from High School that I still despise with ever fiber in my being. Hmmm 20 years later and I still haven't gotten over it. Must have really pissed me off.

30. I hold grudges (see previous # lol)

31. I love bubble wrap.

32. I smoke. And I like to. Get over it.

33. I don't drink on a regular basis, but I have been hammered several times.

34. I love to drive fast.

35. I don't judge people. Well, I try very very hard not too.

36. I love that people can change. (sharp contrast to my # 29 eh?)

37. I can be very moody.

38. If I'm pissy it's best to leave me alone. Doesn't usually take people long to figure that out.

39. I'm funny. I love to laugh and cut up.

40. I hate cats.

So there you have it. 40 of some of the things that define who I am, what I am and what I'm all about.

I really hope that this young lady finds out who she is, but part of me wants to tell her that it's going to take more than 21 years to find out. I've had 38 and I'm still learning.

Peaceout Girlscout

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Updates, Thoughts, Elections and Ramblings

Well, Marching Band is officially over! :( and :) We went to State Finals and came in 8th place. I'm okay with that! These kids are so awesome and I truly love each and every one of them! I'm so happy to have been able to devote much of my time over the last four years to their lives. Mostly to Ashton's life of course, but I'm so pleased to have been able to be a "mom" to many.

I turned 38 years old on Monday, which was also Marching Band honor night, which I also bawled all the way through, and on November 3rd I became an Aunt again. Marisa Antoinette Erdahl was born! (Megan and Victor's baby girl) She was named after Megan's best friend Marisa, and Ashton Antoinette (my oldest baby)

This past Monday Ashton and Brenna started band together (Ashton marched and Brenna doesn't so they had seperate bands during Marching Season) I bet it's kinda cool being in band with your older sister, and especially since they both play the same instrument they're in the same section!

Last night marked a new Chapter in the lives of American's with the election of Barack Obama as the new President. WOW.. I am so happy to see that we as American's have finally crossed over the race line and realized that everyone is a human being. Oh I'm not naive in the fact that there are still a great many racists in this great Country (white, black, and yellow) but I say it's a GREAT testament to many before us that have helped us to be one people.

I won't go on about who I voted for, if I'm pleased with Presidential choices or what my other thoughts are because it's simply this; I am a proud American, I will stand by my President, I will continue to pray for this Country and be thankful that I live in THESE UNITED STATES.

I do wonder one thing though... what gives anyone the right to ask you who you voted for, or to chastise you in anyway for who you voted for? The greatest part of THESE UNITED STATES is the freedom to make choices. Good or bad. I have heard a lot of comments on the negative side of Obama today, why can't we try to wait, and look for the positive. What if he fails? So what if he does?? He won't get re-elected if he so chooses to run for office again. Maybe it's my "everyone deserves a chance" attitude, but come on people, shut up, accept what is and try and do your part to improve this big, beautiful Country. My vote is my vote, as my religion is my religion. It's simply not your business, it doesn't change the friend I am, the neighbor I am, the daughter I am, the wife I am, the mother I am, the sister I am, the employee I am. It's just simply my vote. I obviously have my reasons for voting the way I do. I don't feel I'm ignorant, stupid, un-informed, brain-washed or anything of that sort for voting the way I do. I've never been a "straight-ticket" kind of gal and I didn't start this time either.

I will say I was raised and have been when forced to declare a party, "Democrat". I've never always voted that way. I choose to vote on what I've learned, what I know, and what I see. It's personal, it's private, it's mine.

I belong to a couple of message boards and it steams me to read what some people write. ALL I read tonight was Obama bashing. Not one person posted in support of Obama, yet he was elected. I guess it's like, "no one ever bought a Michael Jackson record" yet, he has the highest selling albums in history. Go figure.

Anyway, I hope everyone gets over the anger and comes back together as ONE nation and we move on. As for President-Elect Obama.. time will only tell. I suppose I "blew" the whole I won't go on about the election comment earlier huh?! Ahh well, my blog. HA!

Peaceout Girlscout