Tuesday, November 25, 2008

"Don't make me kick you in the forehead"

I suppose if you don't know me you really have to understand the relationship I have with my girls. We laugh all the time. They're great girls (Yes, I know I've said this countless times before, but they are) We always have a good time!

One of my phrases to them is , "Don't make me kill you in front of witnesses", or just "Don't make me kill you". That sounds really really bad, but it's a JOKE. Now Ashton on the other hand always says, "Don't make me kick you in the forehead" Which I find so hard to hear her say because when she was little and she didn't feel good she'd say, "mommy feel my fourth head I think I have a flever". I would always tell her, "If the other three don't have flevers than neither does the fourth one". So cute. Anyway, I digress.

So tonight we're all packing up to go to Disney and we're all standing in the foyer (me, Ashton and Brenna) In the foyer is a bench and a hall table , mirror etc. I had asked Ashton to go out to her car and get the Colts blanket so I could wash it to take on the trip, I bent down to pick up Max, she lifted her leg to put on shoes, and she "kicked me in the forehead". Wow, it smarted! The funny thing is I had just told Brenna that I was getting a headache! Ashton technically hit me in the forehead with her knee, but of course it fell back to the "Don't make me kick you in the forehead". We laughed till I about peed my pants.. then I kept saying, "Ohh man, is their a mark on my forehead"

A few minutes later I seriously thought, "I'm gonna look at my forehead, she really nailed it". I go in the bathroom and I had some red areas... then I remembered I got my eyebrows waxed this afternoon! HA!!!!

I can't wait to hear the jokes that come from this!! We love to laugh, so BRING IT ON!

Peaceout Girlscout!

Sunday, November 23, 2008

People who make a difference

We all have people that have impacted our lives, made a real difference in them. I suppose we all encounter someone every day that makes a difference in our lives, or at the very least our day.
I grew up in a little town, maybe 1000 people. As my mom always said, "People around here know ya fart before you do it". Maybe not the most eloquent thing my mother ever said, but the truth all the same.

We lived in a house in this small town and right next door lived my great-grandmother. She was really the only grand-mother I ever knew. My dad's mom had Multiple Scleoris and was an invalid as long as I can remember. In fact, she lived at our house for several years and we took care of her. I remember how pissed off I was as a 13-14 year old kid having to feed my grandmother baby food, and help move her bowels, or lift her up and change her with the hydralic lift. I still feel extreme guilt to this day because of those feelings I had. Oh I know it's normal, I also am sure that my parents felt a little burdened. It's human nature. When she was in the nursing home I remember getting off the school bus at the Elementary School and walking across the street to the nursing home to put lotion on her hands and feet, or to paint her nails, or to start one of her tapes of Christian music. She couldn't speak because of the M.S but she could sing, "I'll Fly Away". That song still means a lot to me. Maybe I wasn't a horrible grandchild to her, but I'm also quite sure I'll live with that guilt forever.

My grand-daddy (Dad's dad) was an amazing man. I don't think there's anyone who didn't love him. He would work, go feed Grandmaw at the nursing home on his lunch, go to my great-grandmothers and eat lunch quickly with her, go back to work and do the same thing again at supper. He'd stay at the nursing home with Grandmaw till time to go to bed. He did this over and over and over again for many many years. He would call the house and pretend to disguise his voice, funny thing is my dad does the same thing. He'd pretend to not know who you were etc. He offered me 10.00 to let him pull my tooth one time. I DID NOT take him up on that offer!! Imagine how much 10.00 was in the 70's! LOL He was the first person I ever lost that I truly loved. I was 11 and I can still feel that pain. What a great great man he was. I still miss him.

But my great-grandmother.. wow. She was the reason I did many things, wanted things.. I remember there used to be a little ceramics store downtown and I'd go in there and buy these useless trinkets and take one to grandmaw and she'd be so thrilled. She put them on the counter in her house, proudly displayed for all to see. My little brother, Matt, got a ring out of a gumball machine and had to give it to Grandmaw. I'm pretty sure she died with that ring on. She wore it for years and years. She's the reason I wanted to get my drivers license. She didn't drive and we would walk to the grocery or post office. I wanted to be able to take her. I think one of my proudest moments of my life is driving her to the little post office. The woman could cook. Oh my, what I wouldn't give to have her cook me another meal.. at the very least her potato salad. I was pregnant with Brenna when she died and she died right around my 23rd birthday. She moved to Florida with her kids when I was 18 but we wrote each other all the time. She had grandchild named Lesa, so the funny thing is in all these letters I have they're addressed to "Lesa" , not Lisa lol I don't care that she never spelt my name right. I had her everyday of my life till she moved to Florida. Every single day. And you know what? I miss her. Every single day. Every day. My brother has a daughter named after her. Hallie. She's spunky like Grandmaw too. I can still smell her.. the kind of lotion or perfume that she used, hear her laughter, and when she was really really mad she'd say "Shhht" she never cursed. That was as close as it came for her, but it made me laugh then and it makes me laugh now. It makes me so incredibly sad that my kids didn't know her. She met Ashton when Ashton was 2. I have pictures of her being held by Grandmaw, but it's just not the same. I wish they could know her love. She offered the greatest love to all she knew. She was 92 when she died, but it doesn't matter... I wanted her to live to be 192. She was 88 when she moved to Florida. I miss those 4 years too. I'm glad her kids got those four years, but I'm just selfish enough to be jealous that they got them. I certainly don't mean that as cruel as it sounds. Just the truth. She is a huge part of the who I was, who I am, and who I want to be. Man, I miss her.
I recently watched an epiosde of John Edwards Cross Country.. in the episode John says, "We never get over losing them, we just get through it". She's been gone since 93, I guess I'll always just "get through it". I hope she knew how much I loved her. I hope she still knows.

Peaceout Girlscout

Monday, November 10, 2008

Lost Diamonds

So the other day I was sitting in the recliner and must have lifted my right hand to move my hair back on the right side of my head.. I felt this stab. I looked down at my hand and I sucked all of the air out of the atmosphere. You know, one of those incredibly loud and long inward sighs? I had lost the diamond out of my engagement ring. I was horrified, saddened and at a loss. I immediately started replaying every moment of that day in my head.

Before I get too far I know you're thinking I typed "right hand" by mistake. I did not. This was my original engagement ring, which was a half carat round solitare. I wear my 10 yr anniversary gift (Engagement ring) a full carat round solitare on my left hand, along with my "gotten over the years" wedding band and anniversary band. On my right hand I wear my original just plain "we're too poor right now to get really cool bands" gold wedding band and my half carat round solitare.

Anywho.. My hubby says, "What????" in a half scared sort of way, and once I can breathe outwardly again I yell, "I lost the diamond out of my engagement ring". His response? Where? Okay, "How the hell do I know??" (yep, that was my response) I thought, "Okay, I put in a load of towels, it could have snagged on that, it could have snagged on the blankets when I was sleeping the night before", so of course I search everywhere. Brenna helped me pull towels out of the washer (although we had to wait for it to stop cause the damn thing won't let you open it till it's good and ready) We checked the dryer vent, the laundry room floor, my bed, everywhere! I never did find it.

My hubbys response to this entire situation was , "It's no big deal, that just gives me an idea of something to get you later on when we have the money." "Don't stress about it, you're never going to find it and it's no big deal." "You shouldn't feel bad, shit happens." "Lisa, seriously, it's no big deal." This went on for 4-5 hours that day as I proceeded to tear the house apart.

Later in the afternoon Ashton (who was at work during most all of this) comes home and she says, "So was it the big diamond or the smaller one?" I responded, "The smaller one, but it was my original" All of a sudden Brad is laughing hysterically.. I'm like, WHAT is your deal?? FREAK!! lol He said, "oh my god, that's great news, I thought it was the carat.. I can come way closer to replacing the half someday"

It was so funny to me that he kept up the "no big deal" attitude all day, when in the back of his mind he must have been going, "OMG that's 3000.00 laying around this house somewhere!!!" Ohh it makes me laugh outloud right now even. He's a good guy. But... he is a guy.

Listen... I love my carat, but I was really upset about losing this. Men don't get the value of diamonds. (outside of the monetary bit of it)

Most importantly, it's my own fault I lost it. It's been snagging on stuff for months and I never took it to be checked. My carat does it too because I have a prong that's a bit wider than it should be. It's spread out over the last 6 years. I don't take my rings off for anything... why have them if you don't wear them all the time.. besides, they have meaning, so I wear them. I will be taking this carat ring to the Jeweler on Tuesday to have the prong fixed!

Use this as a reminder to go and get your rings checked. It really sucks if something happens to them!

Peaceout Girlscout

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Soul searching.

I was reading another blog and was very interested in how this young girl (age 21) was trying to come to the realization of who she is. What she stands for. What's important to her. So I got to thinking.. I'm 38. Who am I? Who really knows who I am? So I have decided to tell me (and you if you're going to continue to read ha!) who I am. What I like. What I don't.

1. I am first and foremost a mom. Very happy to be a mom!

2. I can't say I loved High School, though I had a select few I did love. Kevin, Annette, Edie, LaChelle, Karen, Scott, Gregg. Not many more.

3. I loved Band. I still do. I was a band geek, my girls are band geeks.

4. I love roller coasters.

5. I hate fake people.

6. I hate dresses.

7. I love Bruce Springsteen!

8. I always tip well. (You should too)

9. I have many fears. Mostly about something happening to one of my girls.

10. I love my canine son, Max, probably too much.

11. I love to read.

12. I would love to meet Stephen King, Bruce Springsteen and Eve (she's on my shit list for the whole apple thing.. long story, but it involves me having to go through childbirth) ha!

13. I love Pepsi. Way too much. I am an addict. (have the tattoo to prove it)

14. I love my job. Not every aspect of course, but for the most part, I do.

15. I love gum. Cinnamon gum rocks.

16. I am the oldest of five kids. I actually like/love all of my siblings.

17. I love music. It's like the blood coursing through my veins. It's just that important to me.

18. I love being an Aunt.

19. I love to play games on the computer. (reflexive.com or pogo.com)

20. I'm a shorts and t-shirt and no shoes kinda gal. Don't try to change me ,it will never work.

21. I hate spiders. Seriously.

22. I'm a scorpio. That should explain a lot.

23. I hate lipstick.

24. I have 4 tattoos. Yes, four. A Pepsi logo, a butterfly, and dolphin and a half moon, half sun with Ashton above the tattoo and Brenna below it.

25. I hate racism.

26. My favorite meals are usually meals I make. Which sort of sucks lol

27. I adore my girls, and I'm quite sure they're spoiled rotten. But they are good girls.

28. The first car I drove was a 1977 Country Squire Station wagon with wood paneling down the side. Holy Hell it was horrible!!! But.. it got me where I was going and when I graduated I bought me a brand new 88 escort gt. Man I loved that car.

29. There are about four people from High School that I still despise with ever fiber in my being. Hmmm 20 years later and I still haven't gotten over it. Must have really pissed me off.

30. I hold grudges (see previous # lol)

31. I love bubble wrap.

32. I smoke. And I like to. Get over it.

33. I don't drink on a regular basis, but I have been hammered several times.

34. I love to drive fast.

35. I don't judge people. Well, I try very very hard not too.

36. I love that people can change. (sharp contrast to my # 29 eh?)

37. I can be very moody.

38. If I'm pissy it's best to leave me alone. Doesn't usually take people long to figure that out.

39. I'm funny. I love to laugh and cut up.

40. I hate cats.

So there you have it. 40 of some of the things that define who I am, what I am and what I'm all about.

I really hope that this young lady finds out who she is, but part of me wants to tell her that it's going to take more than 21 years to find out. I've had 38 and I'm still learning.

Peaceout Girlscout

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Updates, Thoughts, Elections and Ramblings

Well, Marching Band is officially over! :( and :) We went to State Finals and came in 8th place. I'm okay with that! These kids are so awesome and I truly love each and every one of them! I'm so happy to have been able to devote much of my time over the last four years to their lives. Mostly to Ashton's life of course, but I'm so pleased to have been able to be a "mom" to many.

I turned 38 years old on Monday, which was also Marching Band honor night, which I also bawled all the way through, and on November 3rd I became an Aunt again. Marisa Antoinette Erdahl was born! (Megan and Victor's baby girl) She was named after Megan's best friend Marisa, and Ashton Antoinette (my oldest baby)

This past Monday Ashton and Brenna started band together (Ashton marched and Brenna doesn't so they had seperate bands during Marching Season) I bet it's kinda cool being in band with your older sister, and especially since they both play the same instrument they're in the same section!

Last night marked a new Chapter in the lives of American's with the election of Barack Obama as the new President. WOW.. I am so happy to see that we as American's have finally crossed over the race line and realized that everyone is a human being. Oh I'm not naive in the fact that there are still a great many racists in this great Country (white, black, and yellow) but I say it's a GREAT testament to many before us that have helped us to be one people.

I won't go on about who I voted for, if I'm pleased with Presidential choices or what my other thoughts are because it's simply this; I am a proud American, I will stand by my President, I will continue to pray for this Country and be thankful that I live in THESE UNITED STATES.

I do wonder one thing though... what gives anyone the right to ask you who you voted for, or to chastise you in anyway for who you voted for? The greatest part of THESE UNITED STATES is the freedom to make choices. Good or bad. I have heard a lot of comments on the negative side of Obama today, why can't we try to wait, and look for the positive. What if he fails? So what if he does?? He won't get re-elected if he so chooses to run for office again. Maybe it's my "everyone deserves a chance" attitude, but come on people, shut up, accept what is and try and do your part to improve this big, beautiful Country. My vote is my vote, as my religion is my religion. It's simply not your business, it doesn't change the friend I am, the neighbor I am, the daughter I am, the wife I am, the mother I am, the sister I am, the employee I am. It's just simply my vote. I obviously have my reasons for voting the way I do. I don't feel I'm ignorant, stupid, un-informed, brain-washed or anything of that sort for voting the way I do. I've never been a "straight-ticket" kind of gal and I didn't start this time either.

I will say I was raised and have been when forced to declare a party, "Democrat". I've never always voted that way. I choose to vote on what I've learned, what I know, and what I see. It's personal, it's private, it's mine.

I belong to a couple of message boards and it steams me to read what some people write. ALL I read tonight was Obama bashing. Not one person posted in support of Obama, yet he was elected. I guess it's like, "no one ever bought a Michael Jackson record" yet, he has the highest selling albums in history. Go figure.

Anyway, I hope everyone gets over the anger and comes back together as ONE nation and we move on. As for President-Elect Obama.. time will only tell. I suppose I "blew" the whole I won't go on about the election comment earlier huh?! Ahh well, my blog. HA!

Peaceout Girlscout

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Dr's Office Etiquette

Okay, after working in a Dr's office for more than 11 years sometimes I'm just shocked and wonder what rock some people came out from under... that is why I have come up with some info especially for those of you who've never been on "this end" of the Dr's office.

1. Please show up on time. IF we're running behind I can guarantee you that we don't like it, we didn't do it, and someone else has screwed up ours and your day.. which leads me to # 2..

2. If you make an appointment to come in to have your acne checked, PLEASE do not come in and want your acne checked, a mole removed, two warts on your finger sprayed, plantar warts on your feet treated with acid, and oh yeah, your dandruff looked at. THAT is what puts people behind folks.. along with my #3..

3. DO NOT BRING YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY!!!! You really wanna honk us off?? Bring your hubby, son, mother, daughter, cousin's neighbors cats uncles brother in law and say, "Oh yeah, while we're here can you take a look at ...." It's not right people!!! It's annoying, it puts the Doc on the spot, it's you trying to get something for free, it's you putting the doc behind because you want a "freebie", and it's you being rude and disrespectful!

4. Do not come in and NOT know what medicine you take. HELLO PEOPLE?!?! Who the hell do you trust well enough to put something in your mouth and swallow it and not know what it is??? You would be amazed at the people who don't. I would safely say, 1 out of 2 people don't know what they take or what they take it for. That's just freaking scary! I don't even trust the love of my life (dear hubby) that much! lol

5. Do not come in with two notebook pages full of complaints. As a general rule anything over three complaints and you're a hypochondriac! Plain and simple! (please refer to #1 for more of an explanation on the problems this causes)

6. Do not treat the nurses and staff like crap, we do run the place, and we do make your appointments, we can either make them soon, or we can make them the second tuesday of next week! Know what I mean???

7. Do not come into your appointment and try to talk to the Dr about your insurance or your bill, I guarantee you that he/she doesn't know CRAP about any of that! Ask the billing/receptionist/nurse. The Doc is simply the Doc. We don't try to do his job, he doesn't try to do ours. Works out for us.

8. If you come into your appointment 30 minutes late and you don't even call and we tell you we might have to reschedule you because you're running behind, do not say the following things.. a) Well, you're always running behind (because my answer is gonna be, "yes, because of people like YOU) b) Well, I drove all the way here! (because my answer is gonna be, "you should have called first") Again, refer to #1 about how this puts us behind.

9. Do not come to the office and be flabergasted, pissed off, put out, upset or down-right rude because you have to fill out paperwork. OH MY GOD! Do you want quality health care!?! There is a reason we need to know these things, we aren't just nosy!

My last rule of etiquette is by far the most important one you will ever read about.. EVER.. as in all of eternity.. UNDERSTAND THE IMPORTANCE OF THIS ONE! Even if you're so ignorant as to commit all 9 crimes above, NEVER, EVER ,EVER commit this one.. focus people...

10. DO NOT, DO NOT, DO NOT.. get on the freaking internet and self-diagnose. This is by far the stupidest thing you can ever do, no wait, something a little more stupid than actually doing it, is to tell your Doctor that you did it. THAT will , not might, it WILL piss him/her off. There is just enough information out there to be dangerous. Unless you yourself are a medical provider, you WILL give yourself cancer, aids, psoriasis, kidney failure, heart problems etc, just by clicking online. Seriously people, there is a reason these Doc's go to Medical school. Most articles written online that you are using to determine that you have some fatal disease is not even written by a nurses aid, much less a Doc. Oh another thing NEVER to do, that's related to this, is to ask your Doc on the way out, "Now, how do you spell that, I want to go home and look it up on the internet". Dumb people... dumb dumb move.

***Bonus rule to help you out in life*** If you think you're special by having 42894 different "mystery illness" issues that happen to you on a daily basis and you think your Doc is gonna be so excited to be able to solve the "next medical mystery" you are sadly mistaken.. you are automatically a nut-case.

Now, I hope that you don't think my rules were overly crass, nor do I want you to think you should keep anything from your physician. I'm simply asking you to use some common sense, be polite, shut your mouth and let him/her talk and do their job, and just trust in them. If you don't trust in your Doc or you're uncomfortable with him/her, then by all means you should find one that you can trust and you can feel comfortable talking to.

Whew, I feel better :)

Peaceout Girlscout

Monday, October 20, 2008


Wow.. seems I haven't blogged in a long time! I've been so busy with Marching Band season and things like that. A quick update to that before I blog about my title.. we've done awesome! The kids made it out of Regionals and we are on to semi-state this coming weekend. These are amazing kids! I'll blog more about my band kids tomorrow or soon.

On to the title.. I've been thinking about dying a lot lately. No, I don't mean me personally. I guess Death would be more the title I should have used.

There was a band student from Concord schools (Elkhart IN) who went to bed one night, and didn't get up the next morning. A 17 year old boy who died of natural causes. Unreal. THAT is all parents worse nightmare, losing one of our kids. I don't understand and it saddens me to know that his mother has to live with "natural causes". That really wouldn't be an answer for me. Also here recently a 33 year old former band student from New Castle died. She had a seizure, and two young boys at home. A woman who's blog I have followed for several months passed away. Talk about an amazing woman! I highly recommend you go and read all of her blogs, she will change your life! www.diaryofadyingmom.blogspot.com I know you know the end of her book, but truly you should go and read each chapter from the beginning. Reading her blog changed my life, though I never met this amazing woman.

A girl that works in the same building as I do, and actually I consider her a friend has a father dying of pancreatic cancer. He is the same age as my father. 61. There is not an hour that goes by that I don't think of Jennifer. Her family. Her dad. It truly breaks my heart that she will soon lose her daddy. Maybe it's because I'm a daddy's girl, maybe it's because I remember as a little girl, I want to die before my dad, maybe it's because I still feel that way. I don't know. Maybe it's because Jennifer is an amazing, funny, beautiful, wonderful woman, and mother, and friend.

Her dad was sent home from the hospital on Friday, essentially to die. I spoke with Jennifer today about her dad's prognosis, and things of that nature. I told her, in some sort of way it's a blessing that he can be here to make his own final arrangements, music, funeral home etc. and it does truly take a lot of weight off of his family to do this. I think in a lot of ways it's an awesome last gift to your family. Jerry Newland is a father, a husband, a teacher, a friend to many. Neither of my girls had him as a teacher in middle school (he teaches middle school history) but he has been a patient where I work for many years, plus I've seen him around school for many years.

It's just not fair. I know I feel bitter about it for Jennifer, for her sister, for Jennifers son Wyatt, for Sheila, his wife. I feel like his time has been cut so short and he's dedicated so much of his life to his students and his kids and grandson. I hurt for Wyatt not having a grandfather passed his young age of 9. I hurt for Jennifer and Angela because I know what I would feel like to lose my dad. I hurt for his wife who spent years looking forward to the years they would grow old together and I mourn the years they won't have.

Truly, I don't know why her dad's impending death affects me so greatly, other than she's a friend and he's a great man, but it seems to be all I can think about.

I think about my own death, my own mortality. I want to be able to prepare everything myself as well. I sure don't want any damn organ music!!!!! Give me some Bruce, some Train, some Dobie Gray, but NO organ music! Have coolers of Pepsi, make a toast to me and raise your pepsi's high! Bury me in shorts and a t-shirt, and for gods sake don't bury me in shoes, if you know me you know I hate shoes!! I will seriously haunt you if you put my ass in a dress!

I suppose it's not death I fear, it's missing my girls, my family , my friends. It's not being there for all of those people. That's what I fear. I still need my mom. I can't imagine not needing my mom. I can't imagine my girls not needing their mom. I can't imagine being without them in any way.

I have a very unhealthy fear of something happening to one of my girls.. truly. It sometimes consumes me, and if I can't reach one of them via cell phone I immediately panic, I immediately know cops are going to show up at my door. I am on the verge of a panic attack. I am consumed, enveloped, and paralyzed with fear. Till finally I can breathe again when I can reach them. I hear sirens and I immediately call Ashton. If she's where she can hear them she answers, "I'm fine mom". No Hello, Just "I'm fine, mom". I still check to make sure they're breathing at night, I still cover them up, hell I still have to order Ashton's food and she's 18 years old! ha!

I'm a worrier by nature I know, but sometimes I wonder, is that even normal? The fear that lives inside me!?!

I suppose I should end this, but think about a couple of things, 1. Have you signed your organ donor card? Is it on your license? It should be! 2. The last thing you said to someone that you love, was it I love you? It should have been. One never knows.

Peaceout Girlscout.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Happy Birthday Bruce Springsteen!!!

Happy Birthday Bruce Springsteen!!! 59 years old today!

I have been obsessed with Springsteen (not like in a stalker kinda way lol) since I was about 12-13 years old. A few years before Born in the USA became a big hit, then of course all the other songs that were huge hits too. It dawned on me that I don't think a lot of people know how I came about this obsession. It also made me think, ya know I bet a lot of people think it started with the Born in the USA song (which it did not, and which is NOT a patriotic song either; but I digress... I'll explain more about that song in a bit)

There used to be a guy that worked as a bagger in the grocery store (the only grocery in the very very small town that I'm from) and he was a Springsteen fan. Now to back the story up a little bit when I was younger (8-9-10'ish) Andy's mother used to babysit for my siblings and me when my mom worked in Tobacco. We'd go over there at dark-thirty in the morning and then his mother would have me wake up Kim (his little sister). I don't think Andy lived at home then.. I don't really remember.

Anyway.. back to the original explanation, in talking to him one time when he was wearing a Springsteen shirt I said, something like, "Who the heck is that?". He told me a singer etc, but the next time I went in there he gave me a 45 (yes I'm old and if you don't know what a 45 is google it, I ain't explaining it!) of Thunder Road. I listened to it, and fell in love with his story telling, his sound... him! So from then on I was constantly calling the Radio Station and requesting Bruce.. a few of the stations kinda laughed me off the phone but whatever.. in a couple more years Bruce would become the biggest thing out there!

Sooo back to my "Born in the USA" story.. It's a GREAT song, but not for the reasons that everyone sings it or loves it. You know my favorite thing is when campaigners use it as background music when they're on stage waving and getting ready to speak or just got done. That's just down right HILARIOUS!! Cause if you really listen.. it's about America not being so great after all. It's about a man in the USA not being able to find a job, about having to go to Vietnam and kill and then come back and be spit on and unemployable, it's about PTSD and it's about not being able to make it in this country without resorting to crime, and it's about going to Prison. So yahhh rahhh for being Born in the USA. It's a song about truth. Not the pretty truth of America but the sad truth.

Google the lyrics if you don't know the song and really read it. It's a sad song.

I have been a Bruce fan for about 25 years. I had my senior pictures taken with superimposed album covers as the background, my 16th bday cake said, "Lisa loves the boss". My senior ornament said, "Lisa loves Bruce". Most of my entire life has somehow revolved around my love for Springsteen and The E Street Band.

Thunder Road... BY FAR the GREATEST song ever written. Written in 1975 by Bruce, and on the Born to Run album. I've always thought if I could ever afford to see Bruce and the E Street band live that's the only song I want to hear. (btw.. they did not sing Thunder Road in concert)

I had the chance this past March to see Bruce live at Conseco FieldHouse in Indianapolis. I was in awe! I don't get into the celebrity stuff, but I actually shed tears when the man FINALLY came onto the stage. I was kinda bummed because one of the original members, Danny Federici has been off battling Melanoma. About 2 hours into the concert Bruce announced he had a surprise. I beat the heck out of my friend Jeanette that went with me and was yelling, "Danny Federici, Danny Federici" AND.. it was!! He played about 3 songs with them and I was just in awe.. Constant smiling!!! I actually got to see Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band. All of them. It was a whole, it was a great life-moment for me. Sadly, Danny passed away less than a month later. He never performed with Bruce and the boys again after the night I saw them. I know this sounds ridiculous to you; but I'm truly honored to have been in the crowd when Danny did his last show with his "band of brothers".

So.. Happy 59th Birthday Bruce and RIP Danny. Thanks for the music, wherever y'all are :)

Peaceout Girlscout

Monday, September 22, 2008


Okay, so I know I haven't blogged in a few days... busy time of the year for me with Marching Season and all.

I said the other day I was gonna blog about songs that piss me off!! lol Well, here we go!!

1. "I drink alone" by George Thorogood. Seriously, this song makes NO SENSE to me!!! The lyrics are: "You know when I drink alone, I prefer to be myself" As opposed to what?!?! That is one of the stupidest lines in a song! Seriously! I don't care if you are "bad to the bone" that's just annoying! lol

2. "Beast of Burden" by the Rolling Stones. Actually, in particular Mick Jagger in this song. Okay forever I had a "misheard" lyric in this song.. There's a point that says "I can suck it up" but forever I thought it said, "I can suck a duck" well, come on , it's Mick Jagger so who was I to argue that he could suck a duck! I was really bummed to find out the actual lyrics! lol

3. "Drops of Jupiter" by Train. Okay, everyone who knows me knows that I LOVE TRAIN! Most especially Pat Monahan, but they have a part in this beautiful, melodic song that says, "Could you imagine no love, pride, deep fried chicken, your best friend always sticking up for you, even when I know you're wrong". Okay, you guess which part annoys me! What is up with the freaking CHICKEN!! Was Pat hungry when writing this song??!

4. The group "Butthole Surfers". That's just annoying all by itself, forget that there music is just bad anyway. I personally, cannot nor will I surf in a butthole!

5. "Echos" by Pink Floyd. Seriously, this entire song is annoying AND 23 minutes long! Come on people, ONLY Meatloaf should record long songs, and that's just because that's all he knows how to do! lol

6. "Yellow Submarine" by the Beatles. Okay, I'm NOT a Beatles hater, as a matter of fact I like a lot of their music, but OBVIOUSLY drugs were available during the writing of this song which has about five other words than "We all live in a yellow submarine, a yellow submarine, a yellow submarine" It's just ridiculous.

Lastly, for tonight anyway;

7. "Dancing in the Dark" by Bruce Springsteen (okay, I know everyone that's reading this is freaking out because they know I am obsessed with the Boss' music and have been a life-long fan and would give both legs to meet the man) BUT.. my problem is not with the song, nor is it with Bruce. My problem is with the bitch (Courtney Cox) because in the video she gets to dance with Bruce. Therefore, I can't like her. On Principle alone people! (p.s. I'm not really a Courtney Cox hater lol)

Now mentioning that last one (#7 for all of you special people) I wanna wish Bruce a happy 59th birthday tomorrow!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRUCE!!!!


I guess that's my rant for this evening.. y'all have a good night and hopefully I'll get a chance to blog more in a couple of days!

Peaceout Girlscout

Tuesday, September 16, 2008


Well, we got the "Ike leftovers" here in Indiana a couple of days ago. The power went out on Sunday from 4-9:30 pm. Whew, glad that was over (or so I thought)

Apparently, one of my neighbors had a tree that was "endangering the power lines". Okay.. so they shut the electricity off yesterday morning at 8:00. We JUST GOT IT BACK!! I am furious!

So, I'm slightly paranoid at night with no lights on (house was burnt a year ago etc) so I have no lights, no fan (have slept with a fan for as long as I can remember) (Brad works midnights so I was in a paranoid fit and heard every single noise there was and probably made up a few of my own!) and so I can't sleep! I knew I couldn't have my son (four-legged canine named Max) in the bed with me because he'd want to lay on top of me. I put him in his crate and he whined, and yelped like a pig.. finally I let him out and put him in bed with me and yes, he laid on me, and I was burning up. Paranoia be damned, I opened the bedroom window for some air!

I finally fall asleep at about 3-4 am, then of course have to get up and pee at 5 am, then my friend called my cell phone to make sure I was up at 6 am. ARGHH no sleep!!!

I get up, wake the girls up, who are already pissed at me for making them go to school when we have no electricity. (HELLOOOO I had to work!) I get in the shower (thank god for gas hot water heaters) and get out, get dressed quickly, do my make-up in the dark, and yes, it actually looked pretty decent lol Go down to the office at 7 am this morning and blow dry and curl my hair. I've had no sleep, patients from hell, Dr who wasn't in a very good mood either, a headache, heartburn, two freezers and a fridge full of ruined food.. which brings me to another gripe!!!

The electric company shut us off. NOT an act of God. They didn't tell us how long we'd be without power (pretty sure I'da remembered being told 27 freaking hours) and when I called yesterday after we were without for 9 hours he said he couldn't tell me how much longer. Should they not reimburse us for our loss of food! My neighbor brought this up today and I think she has a good point!

When the electric company finally came this morning, it took them less than two hours to get the job done!

The excuse they had for not doing it yesterday?? All of their crews are in Texas. Now, honest to god, I feel horrible for the folks in Texas, but should you not at least make sure you're not putting your state in jeopardy by sending all of your folks elsewhere?!?!?!?

Duke Energy KNOWS who they shut off power to. How about sending someone door to door (it was only 3 streets for gods sake) and say, look, you might wanna consider doing something with your food cause we're gonna shut ya down for 27 freaking hours!!!!

So, all day I've been crabby, tired, heartburn (and haven't even eaten a flipping thing) and now I have a house to clean, laundry to do, bills to pay, 64548 emails to check, freezers and fridges to clean out and dispose of, and I don't want to do any of it!!!! ARGGG

Did I mention a crabby 17 year old?? (who will be 18 in 28 days, and yes, I'm still getting the countdown) All of the flutes were to come here after school today to make shirts, and we didn't have power and we had to cancel so they weren't happy, therefore, she wasn't happy and lordy have mercy I don't know why I don't drink! lol

So, I really wanted to blog about songs that tick me off, but that'll have to wait till tomorrow, I'm tired, and I have too much to do!

Peaceout Girlscout!

Sunday, September 14, 2008

First Band Competition

Yesterday was the first band competition of the season! Seems like it got here awfully fast!

Jeanette and I had just got done making the food for the kids to eat for supper and Ashton calls me, crying! She said, "Mom, can you come here I got smoked". I'm like WHAT!? Does that mean! lol

They were marching and she got hit in the elbow (hard) by a guard flag. We ended up in the ER and she has a hair-line fracture in her left elbow! She still marched and we took 2nd! Which we deserved and are proud to get!

This is the 2nd time Ashton's ended up in the ER from Marching Band! I know, I know, you would expect this from football, NOT Marching! lol

Her Freshman year she locked her knees and passed out and took a hard fall down, in the band room. Took out a couple of clarinet players and a stand or two. She didn't break anything then, but then we have her senior year! I guess she came in with a bang, she'll go out with a bang! lol

We competed against Greenwood, Greenfield, and Bloomington. Greenwood came in first.. as they should! They are awesome!! HUGE!!!!!!!!!!! They've won state every year we've been in this. They will again this year! We're class B, but Brad said Greenwood could easily beat all of the Class A bands! They took all "caption" awards (again, not surprised) but we were pretty close in points to them!

Who knows, with more practice, maybe we could beat Greenwood once or twice!

I suppose I should end this and do some laundry. I seriously need to find that laundry fairy and see why she hasn't been stopping by!!!

Peaceout Girlscout!

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Wow... I'm beat tonight!!!

I worked today but then tonight we had a Band Fundraiser at Steak N Shake. Ashton works there and was working tonight.

I've never been in there when she was working as a Hostess, only when she was working drive-thru and I didn't really see her as it's in the back of the restaurant.

I can't believe MY little bitty teeny tiny baby girl works. It makes me so sad. Yes, I know she's almost 18, but she shouldn't be, and well, I didn't SAY she could be. (Which does NOT make this the first time she hasn't listened to me! ha)

I think we did fairly well with the fundraiser, there seemed to be quite a few people in there this evening.

Ohhh my funny story of the night; Jeanette and Caitlin joined me for supper (Brad was at work and Brenna ate there earlier with her Grandmaw) Sooo Caitlin goes to shake the ketchup to open it up and use it; Wellllll the lid wasn't on! OMG!! Ketchup flew everywhere!! Now I was sitting across the table from Jeanette and Caitlin and somehow she managed to soak my scrub pants on the left side of me, and my sock on the right side of me! She's just that talented folks. You can rent her for 5.00 a night at 555-555-1056. HA!

Okeys, well I'm really tired tonight and have tons to do tomorrow. Our first contest is Saturday so Jeanette and I have a boat-load of running around to do to get the stuff to make the kids (all 130 of 'em) food.

Peaceout Girlscout!

Wednesday, September 10, 2008



Do you ever have to remind yourself that millions of people have survived raising teenagers? Do you find yourself wanting to call your own parents 100 times a day and apologizing profusely?? Do you ever find yourself googling anti-psychotic drugs?? ha!

Why is it that our children DO not understand that we love them more than life; that we would do ANYTHING to protect them!?

You wanna know the scariest moment of my life?? The day it dawned on me that I could be eating my Wheaties and if you came in and harmed my girls I could blow your head off and go right back to eating my Wheaties. That really bothered me for awhile. I mean, I think I've always known that every human is capable of murder, but until it really dawned on me I guess I never really gave it much thought.

I can tell you the specific day. As I've said before I got divorced when Ashton was a newborn; I also went back to work when she was only days old. I was working and my ex sister-in-law (whom I still think is a wonderful person) called me and told me that Sperm Donor (yes, that's all he was useful for and will never be referred to by name) had Ashton in the bedroom by herself and she'd been crying for a couple of hours and he wouldn't let her go in and take care of her. (She was a newborn) Every fiber in my being wanted to strangle him. Needless to say I was gone about 2 days later, but for many other reasons than just that. It really scared me to know that I could cause physical harm to someone who hurts my kids. Now, I don't give a rats ass. Doesn't bother me! Mess with my kid, and well, I'm back to my Wheaties.

Ya know the things I went through when I got married the first time (I hate calling it a marriage since it lasted all of about ten months) made me who I am, and I would do it all over again just to have Ashton! It's funny really how God knows exactly what he's doing!

I met Brad when Ashton was just barely 2. He was a blind date set up by the aforementioned ex sister-in-law and her boyfriend (currently her hubby). He said, "I should fix you up with my boss" and I said, "No freaking way I'm going out with your boss, how old is he!?" Of course I found out that he was "our" age etc. I did have a requirement though. I told him, well this guy better have blue eyes. He, of course, had no idea what color eyes Brad had. But he found out! ha!

I didn't let Brad meet Ashton for awhile. I didn't want to be "that" mom. So I think it was a couple of months into our dating and talking that I took her to his house one evening. You can tell my hubby is an only child. He bought Ashton crayons and a coloring book! I thought, holy crap, she's gonna eat the crayons!! ha!!!

Well, we weren't there two minutes and she was in his lap! An hour later, she was puking on him. He had puke down the side of his face, his chest. He calmly set her down, grabbed paper towels and was cleaning her up, then said, "Will you excuse me while I take a quick shower" I was thinking to myself, Holy cow.. she's my kid and I probably would have thrown her across the room if she started puking on me!!! (NOT literally people!) I knew at that moment, I was gonna marry this guy! ha!

To shorten up an already long story, we did marry. He married Ashton and I. He fell in love with her just as well as me. He's so easy to read anyway, and you could just see how crazy he was about her. Sperm Donor wasn't involved in her life, no matter how hard I tried to make him be, so she started calling him Brad-Daddy (never at my suggestion or Brad's) eventually at about age 3 dropping the Brad part of it. When she was five she asked Brad if she could have his name. That's all it took! Of course he adopted her, loves her as much as he loves Brenna and is a wonderful father.

God knows what he's doing!

Peaceout girlscout!

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Happy Anniversary Baby! ~~~~singing away~~~~

Very good thing you guys couldn't hear me singing that! No one deserves that.. although.. my dear dear friend Kat gets tortured with my singing on occassion. Don't worry.. she sings to me too. Leaves messages on my cell voice mail singing, "My names not Lisaaaaaaaaaa". Never said I had friends that were sane, or had any singing ability whatsoever.

Anyway.. today is our Anniversary. We've been married 15 years (for those trying to figure out about the fact that we have an almost 18 year old I'll address that issue either later or tomorrow) Not all 5,475 (yes I used the calculator) days have been wonderful.. in fact some have been just plain bad... but I would NOT trade one of those days for anything. It's what's made us who we are. Two very happily married, in love people.

I guess in some ways we have the "ideal life". We have the 2 kids, a canine son (no, he's not a D-O-G just cause he has four legs and a tail), nice home, etc. Only thing we're lacking is the money stuff... I think it's green.. 'bout all I can remember about it it's been so long since I've seen it lol

Do you ever wonder where different roads might have led you? I sometimes wonder that. Not because I regret being married, or wish I was with someone else (okay okay so the Springsteen fantasies have been there lol) but you just wonder. What if I had not been married once before when I was 19 and gotten divorced 10 months later with a newborn infant? Well, I wouldn't have Ashton and I kinda like her :) But just little things.. what if we hadn't done that, or we would have done that... I don't live with regrets EVER. Heck the only one I had I took care of this past March (seeing Springsteen LIVE).

I wonder how many people think they married a best friend? Or if they enjoy doing things with them? Or if they have hobbies they enjoy together? Brad and I like to do the same things.. amusement parks, casino (if we had money), computer games, same television shows etc. But there are healthy number of things we don't enjoy of each others'. For instance, I love to read. I have never in 16 years of being together seen Brad pick up a book. Hell, he even avoids the book of instructions that come with "big items" he needs to put together! (whole 'nother blog though folks lol) He likes to play some games on the computer (with my bro-in-law) that I would NEVER play. He loves the sun, I would be happy if it never got above 72 degrees. He'll drink Coke , I would NEVER touch a Coke!!, He's quite, laid back and shy, and I'm... well, I'm none of that lol

I guess my point is we have a perfect match-up. I wouldn't trade him for all the money in the world, and I don't think he'd trade me.. well, maybe for all the money! lol

Happy Anniversary Brad. I'm so thankful for you.

peaceout girlscout

Monday, September 8, 2008

Random Ramblings

Ya know sometimes it's like a job to figure out a blog title! I mean come on, no one's reading this but me anyway right??!? lol

Tonight was back to school night at our high school. I now have a Senior and a Freshman. Brad was already at work so I sawed me in half and half of me went to one kids' classes and the other half went to the others. Okay, not really but come on. There is only one of me and two high-schoolers!

I had band booster stuff to do tonight too so I was already by the band room. Sooo I did what any good mommy does. I did the band booster stuff and then went to their first class (they both have band first hour so that was easy! lol)

I don't even agree with there being a back to school night! I mean seriously, can one teacher really meet and connect with 300 parents!!?? I think not. I think it's more about "come see what classes and teachers your kid has". Hmm here's a thought how about talking to your kid about their classes and their teachers. I can learn more at home from my girls than I can going to each of their classes for 7 minutes. Not to mention, I'm not from here, didn't go to school here and would STILL be at school (2 hours later) looking for 2nd hour!!!!

Kids aren't supposed to go to Back to school night so the teacher can't even "connect you with your child".

They bring home 7985 forms to sign after the first day of school along with a list of $98452.25 worth of supplies they need that first week. Shouldn't everyone be paying attention to that stuff?!!?

But wait!! I am Vice President of Band Boosters, have been one of the most active people involved in band for the last 4 years and I truly have NEVER had a piece of paper brought home to me by Ashton. Just tonight the band director is saying how some kids haven't gotten some paperwork signed and brought it. He said, "you should have gotten this orange folder" HUH??? Seriously.. I never get paper-work. Sad huh?!?! Considering I'm as involved with band as I am! lol

Ahhh well.

My friend and I have decided that since her daughter turned 18 and mine will turn 18 in 36 days (yes she counts this down to me daily) that they are far more intelligent and know wayyy more than we know anyway. Damn we're dumb.

I forget when it is that we'll get smart again. I think my parents got stupid when I was about 16 and didn't grow a brain again till I was about 21 or 22. I don't understand what happens to parents those few years but man they get STUPID! Guess it's just my turn. Ohh wait, maybe it's because we have to remember a bazillion things, cook, clean, work, check homework, haul kids everywhere, juggle bills, rob peter to pay paul (pretty sure peters even broke now) do laundry, be "volunteers", cry and hurt for our children, do yard-work, take care of pets, ohh and sleep for a couple of hours a day. Yeah, we don't have anything on our plates lol.

I love when Ashton's mad at me though.. like tonight, she wanted to go to her classes with me and she had band practice, I told her no. So when I was in the band booster room, she walked by and I yelled, "I love you Ash". Of course I got the "go to hell" look! lol Again, like I said in a previous blog; it's fun to return the "pissing off" bit!

I gotta say, I love my girls, and for the most part they "suck it up", "tough it out", and "live it up". But man... sometimes I wonder if I've done my part.....

peace out girlscout!

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Simple, Complicated, wonderful love

I have to wonder why after all these bajillion years someone has not created a "user manual" that the hospital could send you home with after you have these little creatures.

First off, I can guarantee you that if anyone else on this planet choose to hurt me the way labor hurt me, I'd hate your guts. But noooo I'm convinced your children start screwing with you the day they're born. Instead of wanting to beat the hell out of that horrific, pain-causing, vomit-inducing life-form that we call our babies, when they're born.. we love them. Immensley and with every fiber in our being. Starts off pretty whacked huh???!!

Well, doesn't really get any better does it?? I remember the first time Ashton (my soon to be 18 year old) said, "I love you mommy". I bawled. It was the most horrible thing I'd ever heard in my life. You see, she had always said, "I wub you mommy". Then all of a sudden at about 3 yrs old, she's coming off with this love you crap!!! What's up with that?!?!

At least things start off slowly. They break your heart little by little so that when "I hate your guts" comes out of their mouths it doesn't hurt as bad. Which by the way, you're usually so pissed off at them anyway that when that flies out of their mouth you seriously could care less! Doesn't matter when/if my girls ever said that they didn't love me or they hated me or anything else like it, I always told them, "Doesn't matter, I still love you and there is nothing you can do about it". Of course, it's always an added bonus to return the "pissing-off" favor to them!

My girls are beautiful, wonderful, loving, caring girls. I absolutely pat myself on the back. I will tell you this; I was certain when Ashton was about 11.5-13 I wasn't sure I was going to survive. Pretty sure my friend Kat can attest to that. I even told Ashton one time, "One of us will NOT survive your growing up." I truly wasn't sure if it would be her or me, but I knew one of was NOT going to make it! lol

Now that time-frame with Ashton has paid off for dealing with Brenna. Brenna's always tending to be a later bloomer than Ashton in all respects. Even with the mouth. Sooo Brenna is now 14 and she started growing horns and frothing at the mouth at about 13. One day I just looked at her and laughed, I said, "You know what, I survived your sister and you ain't got crap on her!"

I often said my theme song when Ashton was going through "that" stage was Gloria Gaynor, I will survive.

I have, I will continue to and I will love these beautiful girls more than life itself.

Peace out girlscout!